Trauma Bonding and Abuse
“I feel sorry for him. He had an abusive childhood.” “He said he’s sorry for hurting me and it’ll never happen again so I guess I will stay. I can forgive him one more time.” “I feel physically sick at …
Category: God’s Faithfulness
A Friend in Need, A Friend Indeed
At FOCUS Ministries, we often receive phone calls or emails from people who ask, “My friend (or my sister, cousin, daughter, granddaughter) is in an abusive marriage. What should I do?” Good question! We often get the same question …
Little Wife Goes to Court
Little Wife’s little knees were shaking. Her little hands were shaking. Her tiny little voice was shaking. “Ma’am, could you please speak up?” asked the judge. Little Wife looked over her shoulder to the court advocate who had helped …
Restoration in Progress
One thing domestic abuse does very well is destroy our sense of value. We live day after day with an abuser who lies to us and tells us that we are worthless, we are at fault, we are to blame, …
Are You Safe?
It’s one of the first questions I ask every woman who calls FOCUS Ministries for counsel and support and help. “Are you safe?” Sometimes they think I’ve asked if they are saved! We hope and pray they can answer …
Little Wife Crashes
After her escape from Big Man, Little Wife filled her days with job hunting, volunteer work, apartment searching and driving her children to school and their activities, trying to keep life for the children as normal as possible, all things …
This is What Leaving Looks Like
“Just slip out the back, Jack. Make a new plan, Stan. Hop on the bus, Gus. Just get yourself free.” When artist Paul Simon sang those lyrics in 1975, he probably was NOT thinking about domestic abuse. No, I KNOW …
Little Wife Goes Back Home
The very next day Little Wife called the local police station. “Hello, is this the police? Yes, my name is Little Wife and I left my abusive husband yesterday. Yes, his name is Big Man. Yes, my children and …
Restore Us
I was blessed to attend the recent Restore 2022 Conference at Judson University. The subtitle, A Conference Restoring Faith in God and the Church, hinted at the truth that our society is experiencing right now – many people have lost …
Good Grief
I wonder if you know that sickening feeling when you answer the phone, and they say, “She’s gone.” After nearly a year of harsh cancer treatments, my dear sister-in-law Linda went to be with the Lord last month. She was …