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A Plea to Pastors

Dear Pastor, Since 1995, FOCUS Ministries, Inc. has been reaching out to women who are struggling in abusive and dysfunctional relationships. Most of them belong to churches like yours.  They sit in the pews on Sunday morning alongside their abusive husband.  Perhaps you are unaware that behind the smiles and handshakes is a secret that

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May 16th, 2012 | Category: Abusive Relationships, Church Response, Domestic Violence, Effects of Abuse, Insights, Spiritual Direction | 8 comments

Heart Piercing Wounds

Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires. James 19-20 NIV All of us have from time to time said things that we later regret. Emotions run high and anger comes to the surface. There are,

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May 12th, 2012 | Category: Abusive Relationships, Domestic Violence, Effects of Abuse, Insights, Self-esteem, Spiritual Direction | 2 comments

A Time of Testing

When someone has sinned against us, we must choose our response carefully. We may hear various voices from church leadership claiming to know what we should do. Forgive and forget are often the words they choose to say followed by a forceful push toward reconciliation. This approach places a heavy weight of guilt on the

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September 3rd, 2011 | Tags: | Category: Abusive Relationships, Church Response, Domestic Violence, Effects of Abuse, Insights, Reconciliation, Spiritual Direction | 5 comments

Painfully Alone

My 4 year old cries and cries and tells me to call someone to take us away because Daddy’s being mean again. He doesn’t hurt anybody physically but can make an otherwise wonderful day turn into a nightmare in a matter of seconds. He has an uncontrolled temper……always has. I’ve been married for 23 years

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June 16th, 2011 | Category: Abusive Relationships, Domestic Violence, Effects of Abuse, Insights, Self-esteem | 2 comments

Lies, Abuse, and Healing

My problem is that, it’s one thing to work at recovering from the years of abuse, but another to see people that look as though they hate me. I want to explain to all of them that I was abused, not anyone else. I have been researching the deprogramming (there’s a new word for it,

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April 12th, 2011 | Tags: | Category: Abusive Relationships, Effects of Abuse, Insights, Self-esteem, Spiritual Direction | 7 comments

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