There is much chatter today about the Narcissistic Personality Disorder and how it impacts the family, especially concerning domestic abuse.  In a nutshell, these people have “an excessive degree of self-esteem which can be considered a form of emotional immaturity.  They are often a danger to the mental health of those around them, due to their peculiar way of maintaining affectionate relationships.” (from

 Many of us have lived under the same roof with someone who could easily be diagnosed with NPD.  Not surprisingly, most narcissistic abusers don’t see themselves as a problem or even as having any problems (except for their wives, of course).  I’ll list some of the characteristics of NPD at the end of my story today…

Once upon a time in Greek mythology when false gods and goddesses roamed the earth and interacted with each other and humans, there was a young man named Narcissus.  He had some issues.

He was very beautiful as far as young men and false gods go, and a wood nymph named Echo fell in love with him.  Learning of her love, he shouted out “Who is there?” and Echo repeated the question.  She ran to embrace him, but he pulled away and demanded that she leave him alone.  Then come the consequences for his rejection of Echo…

One day while Narcissus was walking around in the woods after a day of hunting, Nemesis the goddess of vengeance lured him to a pond where he leaned over the water and saw his own beautiful reflection.  He fell madly in love with himself, eventually pining away as he gazed longingly into the pond.  He eventually turned into a golden and white flower which we know today as the Narcissus flower, a member of the daffodil family.

Does this sound familiar to you?  Maybe someone you know?  Maybe you wish your live-in narcissist would just turn into a flower and shrivel away?

According to many resources, here are ten symptoms or signs of a narcissistic:

  1.  Holds the monopoly on conversation in your home
  2. Flaunts rules or social conventions, including traffic laws
  3. Fixated on his appearance (and possibly yours)
  4. Emphasis on envy, in fact consumed with jealousy
  5. Total disregard for other people
  6. Needs praise, praise and more praise
  7. It’s always everyone else’s fault
  8. Fear of abandonment leads to breakups and then love-bombing
  9. Living in fantasyland, delusional thinking
  10. Strings attached for all gifts, manipulation

To learn more about the Narcissistic Personality Disorder, please visit this website

If you have been affected by domestic violence or abuse, please call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE . 

For prayer or counseling, please call FOCUS Ministries at 630.617.0088.  


The Lord sees you and He is with you.  Jesus is our only HOPE when we are dealing with abuse and narcissism.


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